You just graduated summa cum laude from college. You're walking off the stage after giving your valedictory speech (which was great, by the way - we loved the joke about the nun, the eskimo, and the feral midget!), when your uncle Stan walks up and places something in your hand. It's long, brown, and smells kinda funky. It's a cigar.
For all you know, cigars are just fat, smelly cigarettes. Like many young people, you know that cigars exist, you know that they can be expensive, you know that they're becoming trendy, and you may even have tried one before. But you still need to be reminded which end goes in your mouth, you're not sure about the part when you "clip off the end," and you still haven't gotten the hang of that whole "don't inhale" thing.
Fortunately, we're here to help. With this SYW, you'll learn your wrappers from your binders and your Upmanns from your Ashtons. We will teach you how to squeeze the most enjoyment out of your puffs or, at the very least, make it seem like you do. And you'll finally understand why it's less appropriate to compare cigars to cigarettes (highly inappropriate) than to compare them to fine wines (slightly more appropriate).
1. KNOW THE DANGERS
OK, we're not gonna get all preachy or anything. You already know that cigars are bad for you, but since you're reading this SYW, you probably don't care. Just note that we love you so much, that we thought this note deserved its own step.
Remember all the stuff you hear every day about cigar and cigarette use: nicotine is addictive, the smoke can harm unborn fetuses, and your chances of getting cancer increase dramatically. Also be sure that whenever you smoke a cigar, that you check with everyone in the vicinity to make sure they approve -- cigar smoke can smell quite strong. But you're an adult. You'll do whatever you want anyway, so we might as well help you make sure that you do it right.
And on that note, on to learning about stogies!
