Okay, smarty, so you're looking to die real quick? Cool, us too! James Dean did. So we're gonna roll ourselves up some cigarettes, and we don't care what the Surgeon General has to say about it.

Why do people roll their own cigarettes? Two reasons: (1) It's cheaper; and (2) It looks pretty cool (remember Travolta in Pulp Fiction and how excited Uma got when she checked out his smoke-rolling action?). It's cheaper because you do the work. It looks cool for a lot of reasons: you're a maverick who goes his or her own way; you are so hardcore that you don't need any punk filter; cowboys rolled their own smokes; and finally, it takes some skill. We are here to help you with the skill part (you're on your own with the cowboy part). We can't promise you entrance into the Land o' Cool, but at least we can get you rolling.

1. GET SOME ROLLING TOBACCO AND CIGARETTE PAPERS

You'll save some cash, doing it this way

Rolling tobacco varies in price, costing from about $1.00 per ounce up to about $2.50 per ounce for specialty tobaccos (for those of you who speak metric, there are about 28 grams in an ounce). Cigarette papers cost from 50 cents to $1.00 per pack, and you usually get 50 papers in a pack. An ounce of tobacco will usually get you around 20 cigarettes (or more if you like them thinner), so your price range for 20 cigarettes, when you roll your own, is from about $1.25 (for generic brands at the drug store) up to about $3.00 (for specialty brands at a tobacconist). A regular package of 20 cigarettes usually costs between $2.50 and $4.00, so you can save quite a bit by rolling your own.

Mmmm...tobacco

Which tobacco you will use is, of course, a matter of personal taste. Just try out some of the kinds of tobacco that are available to you and when you find one which is appealing, stick with it. Tobacco and rolling papers can be purchased from tobacco shops, drug stores, convenience stores, from catalogues, and online.

It is probably best to buy tobacco in small quantities, because it dries up quickly and it is less pleasant to smoke and very difficult to roll when it is dry. Buy small pouches and keep them sealed up as tightly as possible, preferably in an additional plastic bag (you can keep your papers in there, too). The large tins might seem like a better deal, but they don't keep the tobacco fresh or moist enough. Unless you smoke like an industrial solid waste-burning facility, you will end up fighting your way through half a can of dry, stale tobacco. If your tobacco does become too dry, you can try placing something moist in its container and sealing it until the tobacco becomes moister. We recommend a leaf of lettuce or a piece of apple, although apple can sometimes impart a flavor to the tobacco. You can also try using a small piece of wet cloth or napkin, but make sure to squeeze it out well or some of your tobacco will be too damp.