2. FIND YOUR DREAM RABBI

Once you have firmly decided to become Jewish, the next step is to find a rabbi who will be your sponsor for conversion. This rabbi will take you through all the necessary steps, and will proclaim you ready for conversion only when he thinks that you're ready. So it's important to pick a rabbi you like and think you can get along with. When picking a rabbi, you have to consider many things, including location, whether you have to pay (and how much you have to pay) to be a member of the temple, and the temple's level of religiosity. There are four basic levels of religiousness:
  1. Orthodox
  2. Conservative
  3. Reform
  4. Reconstructionist

Orthodox

This is the most traditional branch of Judaism. Orthodox Jews will go to temple every Saturday, and they tend to have a literal interpretation of the Bible. Just think of this as the most religious of the branches. Converting to Orthodox Judaism will take up A LOT of time, because you have to read and learn a lot of Jewish laws, and you will probably have to learn how to read Hebrew. Jewish men who wear yarmulkes (or skullcaps, or a keepot, or whatever you like to call 'em) are probably Orthodox. Non-Jewish men who wear yarmulkes are probably trying to hide their baldness.

Conservative

This is the group of Jews that most would call "pretty religious." Conservative temples conduct a lot of their services in Hebrew, and while their members won't necessarily go to every Friday night or Saturday morning service, they still tend to be pretty religious. Conservative Jews may keep kosher (not eating certain types of meat unless the animal was killed properly).

Reform

This branch has the largest number of members, and is considered to be the most religiously lenient of the four branches. Most converts choose Reform Judaism, because it is generally the most accepting to those who have converted, and it is generally seen to revolve around personal faith and belief, with less focus on the written words of the Torah. Most "High Holiday" Jews (Jews who only go to temple on the holidays of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur) are Reform Jews. Reform temple services tend to be held mostly in English.

Reconstructionist

Reconstructionist Judaism is a fast growing branch, although it's the smallest (only about 3% of all Jews are Reconstructionist). It is probably the most liberal of the four branches, viewing Judaism as a constantly changing and evolving religion, and believing that these changes should be embraced. Reconstructionist faith especially differs from the other three branches in that it does not necessarily see Jews as "the chosen people."

Since you are a smart person and followed step 1 before step 2, you should now have an idea of where you fall on the scale. Now all you have to do is find a rabbi at a temple of appropriate religiosity. Many find their temples through the Yellow Pages, or by asking friends. But for a list of over 250 temples of all levels of religiousness with rabbis who are happy to help you in the conversion process, go to www.convert.org/informat.htm.

When you first meet with the rabbi, he (almost all rabbis are men, although women can be rabbis too) will grill you about your reasons for and dedication to converting. These questions may include:

  • Why are you converting?
  • What do you already know about Judaism?
  • Do you know the differences between Judaism and your birth religion?
  • Are you willing to put in the time necessary for studying?
  • Are you planning to raise your children as Jewish?

In days of yore, if you were trying to convert to Orthodox Judaism, the rabbi might turn you away a couple of times as a test of your desire. But rabbis don't usually play these Jedi mind tricks anymore.

The final important component of picking a rabbi, though, is that you feel comfortable with him. You will be discussing some very personal issues with him, issues that begin with capital letters, like Life and Fate and God and Faith. You should feel completely at ease discussing these issues with him, as opposed to feeling intimidated. Remember, a rabbi is not your leader; he is your teacher who helps you.