SOYOUWANNA BUY A GOOD PAIR OF SNEAKERS?

Everybody needs a good pair of sneakers. By "sneakers," we mean any of the huge variety of athletic shoes that are available to the lucky consumer . . . y'know, the shoes that keep Foot Locker in business. Whether you're a highly paid athlete or you just don't want to ruin your loafers while you do yard work, sneakers are handy to have around. But there while sifting through the zillions of different styles and brands, how will you ever know which sneakers to buy? By reading this article, of course. We will guide you through an easy selection and purchasing process that will put you in the right pair of sneakers. Your only other options are to try shoeless forms of entertainment, like martial arts or yoga. But you'll have to go outside some time . . .

1. KNOW WHAT ACTIVITY YOU NEED SNEAKERS FOR

We assume that you have some particular reason for wanting to own athletic shoes, even though the chances are that, like most lazy people, you aren't athletic at all. Even if you only end up using your sneakers for couch-oriented activities, it can be fun to pretend that you will use them for sports or fitness when you buy them.

Aerobics/Fitness
Baseball
Basketball
Casual Wear
Football
Hiking
Running
Soccer
Swimming
Tennis
Walking

Aerobics/Fitness

You can do aerobics or other gym-related fitness activities in running shoes, cross-trainers, or any sneaker that provides support and cushioning. Some manufacturers have shoes specifically designed for aerobics (for example, the Reebok Freestyle), but you don't need us to tell you that you can do aerobics in something called an "aerobics shoe." If you're just going to the gym to lift weights and saunter around trying to look cool, you can wear canvas shoes, hiking shoes, or just about anything else, but no sandals (stubbing your bare toe is uncool and extremely painful).

Baseball

You don't have to have 'em, but molded cleats are ideal for baseball. You can also wear running shoes or cross-trainers, but whatever you get, make sure they provide good traction. Slipping and falling on your face is great for laughs, but it's not going to win you the game (unless you're the mascot).

Basketball

Basketball requires basketball shoes. Sure, you could step on the court and jump around in all sorts of other shoes, but that's not how our corporate masters and your sports heroes have designed the current recreational etiquette. Not only do you have to wear basketball shoes and no other sort, but you must also replace them no less frequently than every six months, lest you get arrested by the basketball fashion police.

Casual Wear

This isn't really an activity, but it's probably the most common use for sneakers anyway. Just being casual is one of our favorite pastimes. Just about any of the shoes we describe can be worn around as casual footwear, but we recommend walking shoes or canvas shoes, running shoes or basketball shoes, and cross-trainers or tennis shoes, in that order (from most to least recommended). We don't recommend wearing cleats anywhere but on an athletic field. They ruin your floors, and they can be slippery on hard surfaces. Hiking shoes or boots are popular enough with some people, but that's probably precisely because they aren't recommended by people who write articles about shoes. It wouldn't be much fun being a rugged iconoclast if we suggested that you do it.

Football

Football requires molded cleats, and you'd be ill-advised to try to play with any shoe with less traction than these provide. You can slip on wet grass and mud just by walking on it, so just think how on-your-ass you'll be if you're wearing the wrong shoe when some monstrous football player smashes into you.

Hiking

Hiking "boots" have evolved from their heavy, awkward origins to look more and more like sneakers. Hiking shoes are the best choice for hiking, because they provide good ankle support and traction without being too heavy. Running shoes and cross-trainers are okay, too, but they're not ideal because they won't protect your ankles from scratchy underbrush or joint-jarring slips on uneven terrain.

Running

We hope nobody is surprised that we recommend running shoes for running. Most other shoes are too heavy and/or don't provide enough cushioning, thus wreaking havoc on your knees and ankles.

Soccer

Soccer is best played in molded cleats, but plenty of people adapt running shoes or cross-trainers for soccer as well. Again, traction is the watchword for soccer and all sports that involve running on dodgy surfaces.

Swimming

Just kidding! Did we fool you? Actually, you will need footwear (that is, fins) to go scuba diving, but that's a whole different SYW all together.

Tennis

Again, it should come as no surprise that tennis shoes are best for tennis. Many people play tennis in running shoes, canvas shoes, or cross trainers, but these shoes are not ideal because they don't provide adequate support for the side to side movements required in tennis and other racquet sports.

Walking

Walking is a pretty low-key activity, so pretty much any shoe with good cushioning for the soles of your feet would be sufficient. There are, however, walking shoes that are designed for the particular comfort of the walker, and we recommend them for those who walk for exercise or transportation.